home repairs

In my younger life, I looked forward to Thank God, it’s Friday,where I absolutely enjoyed a weekend without my job and its responsibilities. I’d shop, go to a play, a movie, or a party. Sometimes drink too much beer and always revel in the two-night sleep without an alarm clock. As my kids aged, our house was filled with their friends after a football or basketball game. I loved it because I knew all of them and made sure there was food, age-appropriate drinks, and my monitoring. After my kids moved on, I spent my Fridays engaged in the random, boring tasks of life. I didn’t leave my casa; I did chores, read or watched a random TV movie.

Then, three weeks ago, disaster struck! Fridays suck! Can you imagine having an air conditioner malfunction when it’s 119 degrees on Friday afternoon? HVAC folk are scarce as two-dollar bills on the weekend. The following Friday, the outdoor spotlight on the pickleball court failed to turn off. The special light bulb retails about $200! OMG! Where does one find an electrician on Friday? Then on Friday this week, the air conditioner in the guest quarters abruptly quit. At first, I thought maybe a breaker had tripped during the electric storm, but no, that wasn’t the problem. I’m S-O-L until my Monday appointment. Finally, Friday night I decided to watch episode 3 of South Park. (I never thought at my age I would be watching that show, but admittedly Parker and Stone’s relentless attacks entertain me.) Damn! My big screen was dead…perhaps a result of the raging electrical monsoon.

Now, I’ve no idea why I’ve been dealt the Friday curse. In my humble opinion, I’ve not been bad–I’ve been “kind of” good. But if you can recommend an exorcist, please message me before next Friday.

th-6

On Wednesday, the 2017-2018, school year commences in our district. For the next 9.5 months, I’ll receive phone calls and emails from parents and students who complain about homework.

“My kid has to do 25 math problems every night. Don’t you understand he plays club soccer?”

“Why do I have to conjugate every Spanish verb and use it in a sentence? I already know how to do it.”

th-3

“Really? You expect my child to read to me every night and require me to initial it happened? I work full-time and have other responsibilities when I get home. Ludicrous!”

“Why do we have homework anyway? It’s such a waste of my free time. Let’s just stop this silliness. After all, I’m gifted; I get the message the first time. I’m not in need of mindless repetition.”

th-2

Since I’ve served as a school board member for 17 years, I’ve heard every argument against homework imaginable. Even in some of my professional journals, I’ve read about the adverse effects of homework. However, today, it became inimitably clear why school has homework. Lord, it was a revelation! Preparation for life.

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to go to a casino for dinner and gambling. True, I do enjoy wagering occasionally. Yet, I declined. I had to do homework. The kitchen floor desperately needed mopped after the monsoon. My yard’s grass, thanks to the monsoon, would be a foot tall, if I didn’t mow. The swimming pool needed cleaned and nuked with chemicals because of the monsoon. I had to do homework.

th-7

In fact, this past week I’ve been consumed with homework. The condensation drain on an air conditioner clogged and sent water over my floor. The patio door handle jammed and had to be replaced. One of my dogs had poopy butt and had to be bathed. Washing and ironing needed my attention.

And today is Sunday–a day of rest. The Sunday crossword awaits my participation. But first, I must pay the electric and the water bills, clean out the refrigerator, dump the trash in the garbage cans for early Monday pick-up, and…ad infinitum.

Based on my epiphany about homework, the next complaint which comes across my radar screen will be answered: Suck it up, dude. Welcome to life.

th-8

Dr. Suze Espouses

The Plague: TGIF

Homework