Yes, I’m old. Yes, I’ve had to scale back on the jobs I can safely execute. I no longer climb ladders above the third rung, and I no longer use a weed whacker because too many pieces of stone have whacked my legs. However, I’m still capable of cooking, cleaning, maintaining the pool, doing the laundry, and mowing the lawn. I rototill my garden, plant it, and tend to it. But this week, it took me three days to complete the job from hell. A job I will never do again!

The job? Clean the built-in barbecue grill. This task was an absolute nightmare. The stinky, caustic, heavy-duty oven cleaners were of minimal help. Hours were spent scraping with wire brushes, five rolls of paper towels were expended wiping, as were three cans of stainless steel wipes. Even though I was wearing gloves through part of this ordeal, my nails were trashed by my efforts. Then I cleaned the granite counter top using the top-recommended product, which took another four hours. Finally, it was done.

As you know, I spent my entire professional career in public education; I’m a master at rubrics; I know how to fairly evaluate performance. I assessed my grill cleaning. Hmm. My completed project was NOT even average. “Sue, that’s a D. You can do better.” (Perhaps a quote by Mediocrates!) It was probably a F performance, but the grill looked a bit better than it did when I started.

I carefully covered the grill with its tarp, and it will be a long time before I cook a steak or a hamburger. Damn! I just remembered I’m having company next week from cold country. Of course, they will want to fire up the grill. So be it. But the next time the grill needs cleaned, I’m hiring a pro.