(I’m not talking about teenage boys; everyone knows they consume volumes of food and drinks. When my brother was that age, he’d take a half gallon of milk and shred a bag of candy bars into it and drink the whole jug after school. My youngest used to have parties at our home after Friday night games, and I’d have to replenish the pantry and the freezer on Monday mornings.)

What I am talking about, though, is the new rage for birdwatchers: The Bird Buddy. Since my three-year-old grandson, Blake, is enamored with birds, I was gifted this high-tech, AI, contraption for Christmas, so I could share pictures with him of Arizona birds. In turn, he’d share his photos from North Carolina. As a technological immigrant, I was not jazzed about learning to navigate this pricey, solar bird feeder and camera, but…after all, it was for Blake.

Surprisingly enough, I buried the shepherd’s hook in the ground, downloaded the app, assembled the parts, and filled the feeder with native bird seed. I was ready! Over a month has passed. Not one bird has visited my luxury dining establishment. Why? I don’t know. Perhaps, they are camera shy. Perhaps, they don’t like my cuisine. Perhaps, they prefer to peck my nearly ripe tomatoes and devour my grass seed.

I can’t understand why the copious amounts of birds that live in my environs decided to boycott my restaurant. They’ve never hesitated before to flock to a seed block, nest under the eaves, or poop in my citrus trees. Realizing I can’t disappoint Blake, I’m searching for options. I considered posing fake birds on the feeder, but when I checked the camera photo–obvious fake news! I was seriously thinking I’d even buy parakeet and set it free after my Kodak moment. My conscience cancelled that decision; I couldn’t have a parakeet be hawk or owl bait. One of my friends sent me this suggestion:

Do you think I should try it?