The Haunting of Dr. Suze

Yes, I realize I’ve not blogged in weeks.  Cut me some slack, between end of the year school district business, graduation, and a wedding.

As many of you know, I’ve been blessed with household repairs for the last eight years.  A month ago, I had to have to major household repairs, including a new air conditioner and a hot water heater.  Yesterday, I was boiling a pot of chicken breasts for my epicurean dogs, and the cooktop stopped functioning.  Since the cooktop is less than two-years old, I attempted to trouble shoot.  I threw the breaker and reset.  Nothing.  I waited hour–nothing.  The timer worked, the burners didn’t.  After a variety of expletives, I went off to Home Depot to buy another.

The salesman was uninformed and bumbling.  He told me it would be three weeks before it could be delivered and installed!  Three weeks of grilling!  Unacceptable. I wanted to cry.  I went to major appliance store, selected the model, and asked when it could be delivered and installed.  MONDAY!  Hooray.  Plus, his quote was less than that of the Depot.  I was happy.

Several hours later, as I was removing zucchini bread loaves from the oven, I managed to bump one of the cooktop burners.  Holy s#@t!  The burner turned on.  I turned on the other three–damn!  They all lit.  A little, evil voice whispered in my ear, “Cancel your order, Sue.”  For some reason, I didn’t.  I turned on each burner again. Dead.

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At dinner time, I longed for fried zucchini.  I turned on the burner–it worked!  I began to fry the vegetable.   Halfway through the process, the burner died.  By the now, I was either nuts or the dastardly cooktop was haunted.  Haunted by some evil elf who takes great pleasure in twisting my sanity.  Had the neighborhood Catholic Church not burned down recently, I would have gone in search of holy water to rid my casa of this despicable spirit.

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Currently (no pun intended), all of the burners are working.  Yet, I know this appliance is haunted.  It’s going to live with Jesus tomorrow AM.

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